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You can't keep doing this to yourself.
We can't keep doing this.
I can't keep doing this.
I refuse to watch you fall.
Stop trying to give me your heart.
I'm just going to break it.
A Matter of WaitingI'm about to break.
I can feel it in my bones,
in the floorboards that creak beneath my feet.
I'm going to crumble into dust,
and blow away with the autumn wind.
I'm going to shatter into thousands of pieces,
like the glass table I broke last Tuesday night.
Tuesdays were never a good day for me.
They always leave splinters under my nails.
I'm going to rip my heart out of my chest,
and use it to clean up the messes I've made.
Maybe, then it will soak up the ruins you've left for me.
If only I had it to giveI would give you my heart, if I had it to give.
But I gave it to another, although less deserving, long ago.
So instead, I will break you off pieces of my soul.
I will sacrifice my body to you as if you were my God.
I will share my bed, and create for you a home.
I will labor over any task that you need done.
I will show you my world, for you to make it your own.
I will wipe away your tears, and nurse your heartaches.
You will be my one and only, and I will be your only one.
BlindingEven through the clouds,
The sun is too bright today.
I think I'll close the curtains,
Board the doors and shut off my phone.
The lovers all slipped through my fingers,
Cause my heart nor hand was theirs to hold.
I don't remember their faces, but
They left the light on and the door unlocked.
I still pick holes in my skin,
But you're not here to stop me.
I play my wrist like a violin,
Hoping you'll come home.
I saw you last night.
We laughed beneath the moon,
And then it was over.
My eyes are still screaming from your smile.
Love is not countedLove is not counted with forget-me-nots
It is not enjoyed through late night passions.
Nor is it experienced through the bottom of a bottle.
Love is shown through subtle smiles,
The ache of rolling midnight laughter.
It is not sex nor physical beauty.
Love is late night conversations,
Filled with inside jokes and hope.
It brings new life to what you thought to be forever lost.
Love is not judgment nor condemnation.
Love is the hand that pulls you back up,
It is the one who has faith when you don't.
The Boy Who Wouldnt EatIf you can flutter
I have failed you,
for you were not forged
to be so insubstantial as that
You were writ
to be an epic fable
of endings ignored,
of outlasting your body
through the sheer will
of a writers starving heart
through a broken, bowed
but bravely abiding body
that fights the soul
to comprehend Beauty.
BeautyI'd rather wear flowers in my hair,
forming a delicate chain
Than diamonds around my neck,
covering my tender blue veins
For with every precious petal
and every lucent leaf
I'm a living lesson
teaching beauty can not be bought
But rather it grows and flourishes
with every living thought
................written in a frenzy and run-on
and exclamation points
used in rapid succession
words all blurred
so bare bones it's bloody
strung out and on display
in a frightening combination
of paragraphs and stanzas
punctuation gone mad
ellipses my new black
used and abused
then spit out
in gratuitous repetition
there is no word count here
no hearts dotting the i's
just a string of letters
done up in cursive
but not very pretty at all
Fearing MeI'm not afraid to cry
and I do it
a lot more than you would guess.
It isn't always sadness,
I just feel like I need to,
feel everything so strongly
that it's the only way
to let go for a moment
because if I hold on for too long,
if my grip gets too tight
I'll break myself,
I will break you like glass
and we will both
I am a good guy
who hasn't yet found a way
to show it,
I am a good guy
who still identifies with the villains,
hides everything important
anything to throw you
off of my trail....
and I don't know why,
but I am trying.
Maybe I think
that if you could see me,
the real me,
you wouldn't want to look anymore,
want to be anywhere near me,
and the idea
that I can't add up
to be enough for you,
to be enough for me,
is so fucking heart breaking
I can hardly fathom it.
I can't say that it doesn't hurt
because it does,
it hurts a whole hell of a lot,
I've come to depend on pain,
to befriend misery
you're just a question marki met you so long ago
but back then our bodies were made of metal
and nowadays they’re made of the blades of
grass and dirt settling
underneath my fingernails.
my fingers are having a hard time
reaching the keys and
my organs are shaking mostly because i haven’t
eaten in two days but also
because i’m worried about the things you're doing to yourself.
we didn’t meet very long ago at all but it feels like forever ago
and you say you don’t know me
that you don’t know anyone
but baby you're turning into a skeleton and i’m peeling back my skin
to try and reach my bones, just like you.
i hope you're happy,
i’m covering the hard wood floors now
the bits and pieces splattered.
they are calling it a suicide but i’m calling it
a way to see my brain and
just how dark it has become, and honestly
i don’t want you to try and see about your’s.
i’m mourning the loss of my heart and wish you weren’t either -
Sound PoemIthrumden, ithrumden delsum
nith mul thruss elmrissull.
Eth rut mundelliss
Curmiette dessel renrin
irme trell ithrumden.
The partyFlashing lights
Smoke all around
About to pass out
My head starts to hurt
I can't take this anymore
So without saying anything
I find the exit
And escape that place
"How can someone have fun in there?"
as love for summer fades.late morning-
there's the tease of
snow in the clouds,
in the air, and the trees
have finally lost their
the sunlight is damp.
alters the room
as it graces my skin,
and for once
i don't wake up right away.
instead i lay
between my memory bitten
sheets, and i think
about all the times he said
that he hated winter.
i don't remember
when i began to love it,
and i don't care.
nothing can shatter that.
Coming HomeComing down the ramp I spotted you in the crowd
Your tenderloin skin always stands out
Your aura was particularly bright that day
Whirling dervish colors in the pale sun
You wore a chauffeurs cap and held a sign that said “Anyone”
I knew that I wasn’t anyone, so I walked away
“Strange days,” someone said, and I agreed
I hate crowds and old garbled memories
Arriving home, my wife and cat didn’t recognize me
I looked in the mirror and noticed that I was someone else
Still carrying my old baggage, I turned away
I should have taken your limo
Save MeSilence the Voices
Steal my addictions
Give me new choices
Save me from Myself
You made me promise
Break the addiction or Break you
Still I long for the cold silver blade sliding across my skin
The rush, The feeling of pain being released
The pleasure of the momentary numb
The thought of feelings deceased
From your life never must I stray
I need Freedom
Yet still you make me stay
You only use me. I am Meaningless
You hate for this to be
But my wounds seemingly progress
You say you want to help me
Let me know
That you‘ll be there
Or leave me
You say that its not true
You Can save me.
PetalsThe grass tickled between her toes as her father toiled away with the roses by the letterbox. She watched his fingers weave between the thorns to pat the soil around each bush, humming to some John Lennon song she couldn't put a name to. Despite the sun just tipping the horizon, she saw sweat prickling his brow and his eyes squinting against the light. The fine lines on his face were suddenly accentuated by shadow, and for a moment, she swelled with wonder.
'Maria, come here,' he said, waving her over. 'You're not going to learn anything sitting all the way over there.'
Excitement sparked her limbs into motion, and she crawled over to sit next to him, careful to tuck her skirt beneath her thighs to avoid the dirt.
He picked up a pair of clippers from beside him. 'Now, you need to snipe back these diseased parts here and there from the base of the plant. It helps it grow better.'
Snipping off two pieces of wood with ease, he deposited them in Maria's outstretched hand. Their rough textu
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^Nyx-Valentine arrived in our community and started whipping everyone into a frenzy with her relentless desire to bring the Artistic Nude and Fetish galleries to the fore. 9 years later, and it's safe to say that Nyx is not only a leader as a photographer in these galleries, but she has also established herself as a much saught after model. ^... Read More